The one question that you wish you had a simple, straightforward and effective answer to is how can you get your husband to care for you more. You’re at a loss. You love him deeply but you feel emotionally neglected. You’ve gone out of your way to show him how much you adore him yet he rarely, if ever, reciprocates. You’re in the same position as many married women. They’re not completely happy in their relationship but they have absolutely no interest in ending the marriage. They just want to be happier and feel more loved. Just as you do. You’ll be pleasantly surprised to learn that there are actually several things you can begin doing today that will transform the way your husband sees and ultimately, treats you.
It’s very important that you understand that when a man isn’t showing his wife the affection that she longs for, that it’s not necessarily a direct reflection of his feelings. A man can love his wife endlessly yet he has no way of showing it. Men often feel very vulnerable if they profess their undying love or if they pick out a special gift. You need to encourage your husband to feel that your home is a safe environment for him to express himself openly. One of the best ways to do that is to encourage him by showing him the way. In other words, take a few moments each day just to tell him how much you appreciate and value his presence in your life. Tell him you’d happily marry him all over again and that you feel very fortunate that he’s the father of your children. If your husband feels that you cherish him, he’s going to be that much more comfortable with opening up to you.
Being supportive of your husband and his endeavors is another great way to get him to feel closer to you. It’s very easy to fall into the trap of criticizing our spouse when they do things that we don’t think hold value. The problem with that is that it can lead to deep seated resentment and pained feelings. If that happens your husband may subconsciously pull away from you because he feels that you don’t accept him just as he is. You never want that to happen so even if you don’t completely agree with what he’s going, try to find a sliver of something positive that you can comment on. If he’s doing something that you feel may be detrimental to him or to your family it’s important that you speak to him in a very calm way about that. Never push your husband to give up a hobby, a career or an interest that he loves just because it’s not something that you two have in common.
Showing your husband more affection can also result in him changing his actions when he’s around you. Men like to hold hands just as much as we do and you’ll see how surprised your husband will be when you reach for his hand as you two talk a leisurely walk around the block after dinner or when you’re at the movies together. Plan a date night for you and the man you adore. Arrange child care, get dressed up and take him out on the town. You can easily do this on a budget if need be by arranging for someone to take the children overnight and then cooking your husband his favorite dinner at home followed by a screening of an action flick he loves.
Doing small things for your husband can have a fantastic return in terms of the improvements in your marriage, notably in how he treats you. By investing more of yourself into the marriage you may just see that he will do the same. Getting your husband to care for you may be that much easier and rewarding that you imagine.